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Don't let the children hear, but parenthood can ruin marital bliss

It may not come as a surprise to parents, but having children really does impinge on marital bliss.

Nine in ten couples suffer a downturn in 'marital satisfaction' once the first child is born, according to an eight-year study.

And relationship and stress problems are worse for those who live together before getting married and starting a family.

The findings will ring true for millions of parents who found everything from their finances to their sex lives suddenly changed with a new arrival.

But the researchers insist the findings should not be seen as a reason to remain childless as bringing children into the world can bring a 'whole dimension of family happiness'.

Psychologists at the universities of Denver and Texas examined the marriages of around 220 couples over an eight-year period.

They found 90 per cent suffered what they called a 'decrease in marital satisfaction' after the birth of a child.

Childless couples suffered the same problems - only a little later, explained Denver University psychology professor Scott Stanley.

He said: 'Couples who do not have children also show diminished marital quality over time.

However, having a baby accelerates the deterioration, especially seen during periods of adjustment right after the birth of a child.'

The research, published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, found relationship problems were worse for those who had lived together first - possibly because long-established shared routines are more disrupted by new arrivals.

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(Agencies)

也許這對于為人父母者來說并不奇怪，但生孩子的確會影響婚姻幸福。

一項為期八年的調查顯示，90%的夫妻在第一個孩子出生后“婚姻滿意度”下降。

對在結婚成家之前就已經同居的人來說，生孩子對兩人關系的影響及其所帶來的壓力問題更為嚴重。

這些調查結果對于很多為人父母者來說似乎的確如此。他們發現，隨著小生命的降臨，家庭經濟狀況以及兩人的性生活等一切問題突然都發生了變化。

但研究人員強調，這項調查結果不應成為不要孩子的理由，因為孩子會帶來一種“全方位的家庭幸福”。

丹佛大學和得克薩斯大學的心理學家在為期八年的時間里對大約220對夫妻的婚姻狀況進行了調查。

他們發現，90%的夫妻在有了孩子之后“婚姻滿意度降低”。

丹佛大學的心理學教授斯科特?斯坦利解釋稱，沒有孩子的夫妻也會面臨同樣的問題，只不過是早晚的問題。

他說：“時間久了，沒有孩子的夫妻的婚姻質量也會逐漸下降。“

”但生孩子會加速這一過程，尤其是在孩子出生后不久的調整階段。”

這項在《個性與社會心理學雜志》上發表的研究成果表明，對婚前就已同居的人來說，孩子對兩人關系的影響更為嚴重，這可能是因為兩人長期形成的共同的生活規律被新成員打破了。